No one is telling you this about stress
No one is telling you this about STRESS
Have you ever wondered what Stress is and how it manifests in our bodies?
Here is a simple explanation.
Stress is your body's way of responding to challenges or demands. When you face something difficult, your body releases hormones that prepare you to take action, like feeling tense or having a faster heartbeat. While a little stress can help you stay focused, too much stress can make you feel overwhelmed and affect your health and happiness.
When your body perceives a threat or stressor, it activates the stress response by releasing the hormone cortisol from the adrenal glands. Here's what happens next:
Nervous System Activation:
Fight-or-Flight Response: Cortisol works alongside adrenaline to prepare your body to either confront or flee from the perceived danger. This triggers the sympathetic nervous system, increasing your heart rate, blood pressure, and alertness.
Heightened Alertness: Your brain becomes more focused, enhancing your ability to react quickly. However, prolonged cortisol release can lead to nervous system fatigue, resulting in feelings of anxiety and irritability.
Impact on Digestion:
Slowed Digestion: Cortisol prioritizes energy for immediate survival by diverting blood flow away from the digestive system. This can slow down digestion, leading to issues like indigestion, bloating, and constipation.
Appetite Changes: Elevated cortisol levels can increase appetite and cravings for high-fat, high-sugar foods, which may contribute to weight gain and digestive discomfort.
Energy Regulation:
Increased Blood Sugar: Cortisol stimulates the liver to release stored glucose into the bloodstream, providing a quick energy boost to muscles and the brain. This ensures you have the necessary fuel to respond to the stressor.
Energy Fluctuations: While cortisol provides immediate energy, chronic stress and consistently high cortisol levels can lead to energy crashes, fatigue, and difficulty maintaining focus throughout the day.
What causes STRESS?
A lot of the times I hear from people saying, "I am so stressed, I can't function." And when I ask them why, they usually give me similar responses such as:
"I do everything on my own in the house. I don't have any support, and it's stressing me out."
"Oh, work is so demanding, and I have this crazy boss who just doesn't listen. I can't keep up."
"It's crazy. I feel I don't have time to breathe as I am constantly on the go. Work, life, kids—it's just too much."
When they give me such an answer, my first question to them would be:
"Why do you do everything in the house? Is anyone expecting you to do that?"
"Have you clearly and in a loving way communicated your expectations with your loved ones?"
The majority of my clients and friends would look at me with a strange, a bit of a "What is she talking about?" look until I explain what I mean. So hear me out.
The Reality of Stress: Unfulfilled Expectations and Undelivered Communication
Did you know that 65% of workplace conflicts and 50% of marital issues arise from unfulfilled expectations and undelivered communication? These two factors are the primary culprits behind much of the stress we experience daily. Whether it’s at home or in the office, when our expectations aren’t met or when we fail to communicate our needs effectively, stress levels soar.
Imagine expecting your partner to handle certain chores without clearly discussing it, only to feel overwhelmed when those tasks aren’t completed. Or consider a workplace scenario where you assume a colleague understands your deadlines, but without proper communication, projects fall apart. These misunderstandings create a cycle of frustration, anxiety, and resentment that fuels stress.
Understanding Stress: How It Affects Us
Stress doesn’t just come from external factors; it often stems from within ourselves. How many times have you felt self-doubt or a lack of self-love because you didn’t achieve a goal you set for yourself? These feelings arise from unrealistic expectations and poor communication with ourselves about what we truly want and need.
Have you ever wondered if your expectations are realistic? Have you clearly communicated your desires and needs to yourself? When we set goals that are too lofty or fail to articulate our true intentions, we set ourselves up for stress and disappointment. This internal miscommunication can be just as damaging as any external conflict.
3 practical ways to shift that:
In the next two days, I would like you to solely focus on these two things in order to shift your stress levels:
When you are faced with a stressful situation—whether at work or at home—I want you to either in your mind or better yet on a piece of paper or on your phone analyze this:
In this particular situation—for example, if we take the argument between two marriage couples at the beginning of the blog—
Has the woman clearly communicated her expectations to her partner—that she needs help with the house, chores, cleaning, and rest?
If she did, how did she communicate it—in a bossy, very harsh and demanding voice or in a loving and caring voice?
Ask yourself the question: Are my expectations from this person realistic, and have I communicated them properly so they can hear me?
This is how I do it with my husband, and maybe it can help you as well.
The other day, I came into the house with the kids. Before I came in, I called him and asked him to buy some food to prepare lunch. When I came into the house, I was expecting that he had already prepared lunch for us. I remember it clearly how my stress rose as I walked into the kitchen and saw all the food he bought on the kitchen bench sitting. There was no food prepared, and the kids were hungry. I started to get furious, and in that moment, I stopped and asked myself, "Ok, so you asked him to buy food, but did you ask him to prepare lunch?" The answer was obvious: "No, I haven't." The bottom line is, I was expecting him to do something that wasn't on his priority list, as he thinks differently than I do. That is why I took five deep breaths and said to myself, "Unfulfilled expectations and undelivered communications." I relaxed, put a smile on my face, and started cooking.
Later that night, I sat down with him and told him what happened in my mind, and he smiled and told me, "I knew you would react like that, and I was proud of you that you didn't come in bashing and criticizing me as I needed to finish painting the room for our guests that are coming in three days," which I had totally forgotten about.
Do you understand? If I had slammed the door, as I would have before understanding this concept, I would have caused yet another argument that would not bring us anything but stress, hurt, and pain.
Before you go ahead and get angry about anything, always ask yourself: Where are my expectations coming from, and am I communicating them properly?
If you practice this in the next two days, I can guarantee your life will transform.
Check my YOUTUBE channel where I talked about this topic in more depth.
About the author you can read HERE
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